For more ideas on how to fill your technology free time visit:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/16/things-you-can-do-without_n_4937255.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular

Book Review: Parenting Well in a Media Age

I didn’t know what to expect before reading this book because I’ve never read a book about parenting.  I’ve taken a lot of parenting classes at the University though so I’ve felt pretty educated about parenting subjects.  The book Parenting Well in a Media Age, by Gloria DeGaetano, discusses the parenting challenges that face parents today as a result of our industry-generated culture.  She mostly discusses children spending too much time watching TV, but also takes into account music, and video games.  She does not address social networking much. 

What I really liked about this book was that DeGaetano gives references from research as well as relatable examples.  My favorite parts of the book was when she gives specific examples of what to say and how to talk to your child that will help him/her grow in that essential need.  These examples are also separated into ages; so she gives examples on how to talk to your toddler, middle-aged child, and teenager.  She also gives specific example of activities to do with your child of specific ages as well. 

One part of the book that really spoke to me was when DeGaetano discussed creative thinking in children and image making. She said that children, “Are limited to thinking in the images that the media has provided for them,” (DeGaetano, 2004, 9).  She explained that in drawing, or writing stories, children could not think up their own characters or plots: they could only think about a super hero that they have seen on TV.  That was surprising for me how much television can really limit a child’s creativity and motivated me to use other methods to spark my toddler’s creativity. 

After reading the book I decided to try to have the television on less at my house. According to DeGaetano, this can help increase, “A loving parent-child bond, a rich inner life, the capacity for image-making, the ability for creative expression, and participating as a contributor,” (DeGaetano, 2004, 56).  While having the television off at my house I noticed a lot of things.  I am extremely guilty of letting my toddler watch shows while I put my infant down for a nap or feed her.  It is easy and quiet.  It was fun to see what my son was able to come up with to do on his own while I fed her. I saw his imagination sparking and saw how his own ideas were flowing through his head.  One surprising thing that I noticed was that I was more patient with him and he was more patient with me while the TV was off in our house.  Tyler was more willing to wait for me to play with him while I finished doing a household chore, than if he was waiting while watching a TV show.  The best part was that I could see a difference in our parent-child bond when we were able to spark conversations and talk more about feelings than we would if we had a show on.  DeGaetano discusses the importance of a face-to-face interaction when trying to increase a parent-child bond.

I would recommend reading this book for any parent because it has great ideas for alternatives to television for all ages of children.  These ideas are well in line with the research I have read for my other three blog posts.  She writes in a very relatable way and doesn’t write in a way that condemns parents for allowing their children to watch television.  TV is going to be an inevitable part of people’s lives and she explains why taking it in moderation can benefit families.  She empowers parents in taking the initiative to limit their children’s television usage. 

DeGaetano, Gloria. Parenting Well in a Media Age: Keeping Our Kids Human. Fawnskin, CA: Personhood, 2004. Print.

Pass it on!

Love and Logic Institute, Inc.

Complex skill of the day:
1) Put electronic device down
2) Look at your child & smile
3) Have a response ready when they ask why you're being weird

Distracted? Help is available!!

Book Review by Stacie Lawrence

Distracted: The Erosion of Attention and the Coming Dark Age

Excerpts from my review of Maggie Jacksons book Distracted:

Jackson writes that television (and other technology/media) is contributing 

to children being less able to engage in focused play, 

suggesting that television is contributing 

to more individuals with the characteristics of 

attention-deficient children.  

She states even "parents are ...distracted, interacting 20 percent less with their kids and relating passively" and that "more than half of children ages eight to eighteen live in homes where the TV is on most of the time." (Jackson, 73)

All this and more ....reading Distracted by Maggie Jackson! 

What did others have to say?
In writing the Forward to this book Bill McKibben discusses his awareness of distractions in his life.

He states: "Distraction has always been a human condition". (Jackson, 9)  "This book, remarkable impressive both for its wealth of detail and the clarity of its synthesis, forces our attention on that inattention." (Forward, Bill McKibben in Jackson, 10)

Jackson herself says that she did not set out to write a book on attention. She "was curious why so many Americans are deeply dissatisfied with life, feeling stressed" (Jackson, 25), and that "more than half typically have to juggle too many tasks simultaneously and/or are so often interrupted that they find it difficult to get work done (Jackson, 17, from Galinsky). 

What did I get from reading Maggie Jackson's book?

With the ease of technology we have a lot of wonderful benefits, but also we find ourselves slacking or lacking in significant areas.  The immediate gratification of an instant message, an email alert, a snap chat - a "like" on Facebook - takes our attention from things that matter most.  Like Bill McKibben noticed after reading the book Distracted, I too have been much more aware of the things that shouldn't matter taking precedence over those things that do.  If I am so concerned about the number of notifications that add up to whether I am "liked" enough than I am losing sight of the things that I sincerely like - my family, my friends, my peace (and quiet) of mind!  

This book made me think about those things more.

The final word!

In the final chapter titled The Gift of Attention Jackson asks "Can attention be trained?" (254).  She summarizes that it is in how we pay attention.  "Splitting one's focus between a work project and one's child demotes both to half a priority each".  This single statement makes me, as a parent, want to focus my attention on what matters most.

Jackson defines distraction using the Oxford English Dictionary:  

"drawing away (of the mind of thoughts) from one point or course to another; diversion of the mind or attention, usually in the adverse sense." (Jackson, 259).  

She goes on to say that "attention is not always within our control" but that to reverse the adverse effects of inattention and distraction "we must understand, strengthen, and lastly value attention." 

With the examples, the research, the stories shared, and the attention to detail, Maggie Jackson writes an informative text that will help you to evaluate distractions in your own life, 
and more important, to recognize what you value more. 

If you, or someone you know, is Distracted - you don't want to miss this great literary experience!

PS:  While looking into this book I came across this blog post written by the author herself, Maggie Jackson.  
Here is a link to Encyclopedia Britannica and the post titled:  Multitasking, the problem: Distracted and Dangerous.

Pretty interesting stuff! 

Leave us a comment below if you have read the book before

 or if you have a question or insight about what you have learned from our reviews.

Book Reference:  Jackson, M. (2009). Distracted. The Erosion of Attention and the Coming Dark Ages. Prometheus Books. Amherst, New York.

Additional reference:  Galinsky, E. et al., Overwork in America:  When the Way We Work Becomes Too Much. (New York:  Families and Work Institute, 2005), pp 2-4

Find more reviews on our Book Reviews Link 
including a review by Stephanie Stevens on the book  Cyber Junkie!

Technology - Don't Let It Ruin Your Life

 

Here is a fun video my wife and I made about too much technology.

Hi-Tech Relationships: What is Lost?

Here’s the YouTube video I made which basically shows negative affects of computer mediated communication and how technology is affecting personal relationships.  I believe many people don’t understand some of the consequences that come from using Facebook as a way to connect with others.  Some of the drawbacks of computer mediated communication include:

• ·      Too much performance
• ·      Time consuming, addicting
• ·      Overly personal through disclosure
• ·      Overly impersonal, being open to all
• ·      Takes away from face-to-face relationships
• ·      Losing interpersonal skills
• ·      Misunderstanding from lack of nonverbal communication
• ·      Distractions and ambient awareness
• ·      Authenticity of relationships (Cummings, 2013)

Stephen Benson says, “Postmodern man does not participate in face-to-face collaboration, and is impoverished as a result,” (Benson, 1998).

The video is a bit long, but the people in the interviews mention many of these drawbacks.  Each person comes from a different point of view, but they seem to feel generally the same way about the unintended consequences of connecting through technology.  The entire video is worth watching!

Benson, Stephen P. "Village People? The Net Generation." IEEE Communications Magazine 36.1 (1998): 32-35. Ebscohost. Web. 25 Feb. 2014. <http://ieeexplore.ieee.org.ezproxy.lib.utah.edu/stamp/stamp.jsp?tp=&arnumber=649325>.

Cummings, Jennifer. "Computer Mediated Communication." University of Utah, Salt Lake City. 26 Sept. 2013. Lecture.

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